Author: Regency

Title: Fear

Spoilers: None

Summary: Regina faces the aftermath of a car accident.

Disclaimer: I don’t own them.

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She was off-duty when the accident happened. The cab jumped the curve and hit her as she walked down the sidewalk, her arm linked with that of her latest lover. They’d been headed towards her place for drinks and maybe more. Right before, someone heard her laugh. She hadn’t been that happy in so long.

She was rushed in on a gurney, more than two lines hooked into her like ill informed umbilical cords. She breathed in hiccups of oxygen to her lungs. Her intelligent eyes didn’t move beneath their lids. Her pale skin was dark and, imprinted indelibly on her clothes, was that harsh outline of the cab’s front grille. Her doctor touched it, feeling a surreal detachment about the sight before her.

She knew this woman. Hard reality knocked her in the stomach and she began to give orders. More saline, two units of O-neg, something! She didn’t want this. God, she didn’t want this! They ran down the sterile corridors of the hospital, yelling at each other. They lost their well-practiced calm and nearly forgot what they knew. They were scared; she was one of them.

She was one of them and she was dying. They cut off her clothes, cleaning away more blood than they ever wanted to see again. So much blood for one so petite. Her veins constricted. The paramedics kept the ambu-bag going, filling and refilling her lungs with breath when she couldn‘t. She’d stopped breathing on the way. Twenty precious feet, a minute and a half and her heart stopped.

One of the nurses pulled the defibrillator over, handing the ER physician the paddles automatically. She took them, holding back whatever emotion lay just under the surface. She prayed this worked. She needed this to work. She couldn’t lose this one.

She was one of them, one of hers.

A resident put down the shock pads, the nurse applied the gel to the steel paddle bottoms.

She yelled, “Clear” and they all jerked back only to close in for a vitals check. Nothing. Nothing. Another time. Clear!

Someone prayed out loud. She almost begged her to live. She didn’t want to tell her family, she didn’t want this on her conscience forever. Live!

A third time. Her entire body arched up from the gurney, almost conscious in its animation. She landed hard, her wrist cracking against the handrail. They listened. And listened. A tenuous beeping tickled their hope. Weak and thready, she didn’t want to count on it. But it continued. A beat, a beat, a beat.

She almost cried, handing off the paddles to someone and touching her patient’s face. She stroked her light hair from her bruised face. She kissed her temple, ignoring the drying blood and the grit and the latex on her skin.

She was beautiful and perfect. Please, stay alive. Please, she begged without saying. She ordered someone to set up a room and to order an x-ray and a CAT scan. She wasn’t going anywhere. She wouldn’t leave this woman’s side.

“You’re gonna be okay. I promise.” Her eyes remained closed, but she breathed. And her heart beat in her meddling chest. “Just stay with me.”

She was so small lying there. Regina wanted her to wake up and be the imposing, neurotic woman out to control all of their lives. She wanted her to be over animated and overprotective. She wanted Lydia back.

“Please, don’t leave us, mom.”