Author: Regency

Title: Bang Bang

Spoilers/Sequel: No

Rating: PG for violence.

Pairing: Charlie/Zoey

Summary: The boy that loved me shot the boy that I loved...His body hit the ground and only God heard me scream.

AN: None.

~~~

I was five and he was six

We rode on horses made of sticks

He wore black and I wore white

He would always win the fight

I met a boy when I was young. He was nice or so I thought. He owned a kitten and held it close. He even let me pet it sometimes. When I got older he became my first crush and older still, he became my first boyfriend. I loved him, at least, I thought I did, until another boy came along. He had dark eyes and dark skin, and a great smile. I loved him instantly. His name was Charlie. I forgot the other boy in moments. Maybe that's where it all went wrong. His was the first heart I broke. But, he didn't take it lying down. He changed and was determined to break mine too.

Bang bang, he shot me down

Bang bang, I hit the ground

Bang bang, that awful sound

Bang bang, my baby shot me down.

I was with my boy and I gave him a chance, despite all of the circumstances and I was joyful to the end. We remained friends. Or so I thought. I knew he still loved me, but I didn't care. In my heart, there was one boy there. He had dark eyes, and dark skin, and a great smile. His name was Charlie.

Seasons came and changed the time

When I grew up, I called him mine

He would always laugh and say

"Remember when we used to play?"

I remembered the way we used to play and I would reminisce with him some days. He would laugh and ask if I missed those times. I would say that they were fun, but that was before my life had begun. Charlie wasn't there yet. I wasn't even really real then. I don't think I'm really real now. He isn't with me. I know why.

Bang bang, I shot you down

Bang bang, you hit the ground

Bang bang, that awful sound

Bang bang, I used to shoot you down.

I always knew he wanted me back, but I wasn't interested, not in that. He was gracious at first. Sweet and kind and understanding, but the closer to my new boy I got, the more malicious he became. Where was my friend? I didn't know when he'd disappeared. He was hard to talk to, hard to be around. He would speak of my boy as though he were less than him. I didn't like it, so I said so. He didn't like it, so he left. I cried for the boy he had been; the boy who had loved me. Did I do this? Did I change him? Charlie came and held my hand said that there were things I couldn't understand. I asked him what. He didn't say. He simply finished that he'd love me forever and a day. If I had known then what I know now, I wouldn't have left the house.

Music played, and people sang

Just for me, the church bells rang.

I stare at myself in a dark, polished box. I stare into my darling's eyes. I see nothing at all, to my surprise. He looks through me and sees nothing. I want him to see me. He doesn't.

Now he's gone, I don't know why

And till this day, sometimes I cry

He didn't even say goodbye

He didn't take the time to lie.

He was walking home and I watched him. Everyday, I watched him. He'd tried to heal, tried not to hurt, but had succeeded at failing. I matched each of his steps, I saw the agony in his eyes. I loved him every step of the way. Will he make it home tonight?

He comes so close to home, but I'd already known. I see a shadow and I know he won't. That face, my boy. The boy who loved me shot the boy I loved. In my eternal silence, I pleaded for him to abstain, to stay away. He didn't. His body hit the ground and only God could hear me scream. He saw the boy who did it, but was to weak to respond. I knew that soon he would leave and be gone. I kneeled at his side and gave him comfort. I wanted him to see me. He saw me. My name was the last on his lips.

Zoey...

I'd waited so long to see him. He was there. He took my hand and kissed my fingertips. We looked back to see the world at large swarm in on him. I could see my father's grief and my mother's helplessness. I could feel the weight of his loss on my shoulders. He was only faint. He hadn't let go yet. I've been where he was, the sounds echoing in my ears. Those people in black too late to stop the blood around your head, leaking silently from your lips. I've been where he was. I am where he is. I told him I that I loved him and he that he loved me. And...we let go.

Bang bang, he shot me down

Bang bang, I hit the ground

Bang bang, that awful sound

Bang bang, my baby shot me down...